Writer

About the Author:

Francis McFadden is 28 years old and the return address from his manuscript reads "Bumblefuck, Nebraska." While not giving his legitimate address, his 200-page cover-letter/autobiography states that he began living in a cabin in "the sticks" at the age of 19 after being compelled to write by tiny creatures living underneath his fingernails who send suggestions to him via a throbbing in his hand in Morse code.

He did not go to college. He had poor marks in school. He was considered, by all intents and purposes, borderline illiterate. He was a cart pusher at a local supermarket until August 15th, 2000, whereupon he simply walked off the parking lot and never came back. His possessions at the cabin include a fishing pole, a large hunting knife, some assorted cookware, and a very old typewriter which he explains the creatures much prefer to pen and paper. It is easily the most technologically advanced device in a 10-mile radius.

The manuscript, along with the autobiography, were typed on a type of homemade paper akin to papyrus, and Francis explains that after taking the better part of 6 months to construct his home himself with stolen tools and wood from the surrounding forest, that he has lived entirely off the land at the creatures' request.

In his free time, he likes to fish, swim in the pond a mile from his house, and play with Bandit, a fox he trapped outside his home.

Francis' favorite song is "Stand By Me," by Ben E. King, but he hasn't heard it in 10 years. His favorite books include stolen copies of Catch 22, The Proud Highway, Jesus' Son, and Lord of the Flies.

At the time of printing of this second edition, Where the Fuck is Now? has spent a total of 35 weeks on the New York Times' Bestseller List, and has sold fifty million copies worldwide. According to Francis it is his twenty-fifth novel, but it is unknown if he intends to share any others with the world.

Anyone having any information on contacting Francis, or how we can deliver a check for his book is advised to contact Penguin Publishing at the address listed in the copyright information of this book.